It sure is nice when everything is going perfect, and the storms of life are no bigger than a simple apology or a single prayer. The problem is that those days are few and far between. For quite some time I was very content with where i was as a Christian, (that should have been my first clue that something was wrong)! As I am getting older and am starting to face some of my own battles I realize that "oh boy, I just cannot do this on my own".
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, where does my help come from.
I read the story of Corrie Ten Boom a few years back and this story has been on my heart.
Corrie and her dad were at a train station getting ready to board, when Corrie asks her dad what is "sex"? At this time she is little more than around 8 years old. Her dad does not reply but simply asks her to carry his suitcase for him. She complies and tries to pick up the heavy suitcase, she gets a few steps and her dad notices she is struggling carrying the suitcase on her own. He gently grabs the suitcase from her and hands her thier tickets. Her father asked her if she remembered the question that she had previously asked and she said, "yes". He then told her that some things in life are too heavy to carry such as the suitcase was just moments previous. He said that the suitcase was just like that question, it was simply to heavy for her to carry right now. He said as you get older and stronger you will be able to carry the suitcase and the same goes for your question. My daughter right now your not quite strong enough and you must trust me to carry the baggage for you.
That story has been on my heart since the day I heard it. There are always situations in life that are just too much for us to bear on our own. I am reminded that what I face is impossible on my own, but if I just ask my father to carry it, he will. Oh so many times in the recent months I have come to the understanding that I am more fragile and weak than I thought. Situations I thought I had all figured out came around and took me by surprise, and well to put it bluntly, I fell and I fell hard. The thing is I have never ever grown more in who I am in Christ and as a person as I have these last few months. Lord "Here I am" is becoming a very important line in my life. I know that when I try to do it on my own and in my own strength I fall. I still try to carry things on my own sometimes, but He brings me to the reality that I need him to carry all my problems, not just the big ones.
Isaiah 40:30 "Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall. but those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint."
Father will you carry this suitcase for me it is just too heavy for me to bear.
Matthew 11:28 " Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."
He smiles and replies to me,"Yes, my son I will carry your burden."